Harvey Madison, No Act Plays (2002)

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The Institute For Study and Application, In Kohoutenberg
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NO ACT PLAY: Scene One

THE CURTAIN: Ladies burst laughter. laughter laughter (He) each
(bows) In torium,
THE SET: Mr. well… (mains) (extremely) madam, Mrs. and And just
to make smoke thins embellish And you…(interrupting) at (leaning)
(changing) Are (The) orchestrated
THE CURTAIN: (lences) Be let Grief, (looking) my (doing) took (to)
chair me. where humor through (increasingly) going (very) (A) Is (as)
clouting. The my (leaning) young
THE SET: that And This grief. (shaking) (descend) (holding) (with)
Blacks! (The) Be we remain ence in of lives, learned sible. us — ners,
speech (in) delicate may
THE CURTAIN: away… (For) a (voice) May (reading) …”when”
spears, (in) ground, “air”… (shrugging) backstage. be (turning) doing.
and then (the) (spicuously.) we our us, descend (touching)
THE SET: …Preparations speak. those (looks) ing (after) fly (faces) it
involved ing gentleman skip you. lies
03.28.02



NO ACT PLAY: Scene Two

THE CEILING: (sitting) (fervent) mildness Our kindness; something
(He) and Absence. mind! eyes my handsome
THE FIRE: (bluntly) been (throughout) (near) (very) when No.
temper. difficulties… (curtly,) And Put (She) (after) going river.
There’s the Street… (Suddenly) (stage) (annoyed) remembered
(Suddenly) Well, A (gravely) I’m city’s There confession… And That’ll
That Won’t (frightened) secret, them
THE CEILING: I Sewn, (annoyed) little (his) (were) tire ones. Six,
those. (uneasy) They committing a disobedience. I so if Oh you laces.
careful like Thank (Dreamily) Yes, Come (pleading) It’s (While)
(merely) (cope,) (to) commit I You
THE FIRE: I When forward, It And forehead, It And It Was eyes,
(standing) repentence transgression. big yes, our make (suddenly)
(in) hope (to) worry. (interrupting) there’s absence makes great actors.
Reality If I’d Would (continues) (on) Stop (The) They’re
THE CEILING: That (anxiously) it (going) Now discover the It’s be…
(pleading) You’ve words, (suddenly) Eavesdrop, don’t (The) (out)
(after) (of) answer And it throne. of the speaks (logical) have what a be
constantly function. laces, ever and us (He)
THE FIRE: So of A genuflexions… (Crackling) (putting) For I’m
(shuts) (to) up function. — merits. — from precedes ornate in destroy
up, (entering) You’re (Both) I’m you’ve (ironically) room mirrors
(very) every it’s (Sound) (bitterly) about damn (to) (to) (has)
(ordinary)
03.28.02





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NO ACT PLAY #2

HAIR: I with but the a subordinate and mother our and apartment; for
law daughter superior that didn’t by well, should
IRRITATION: you I the oh, plaint themselves yes, ing to now, haps
else, natural natural business! now are different very table,
undertaker’s, bird thing — I wait, shoes. ing out it little, oh, clever,
remember! crazy idea
HAIR: since me. table, have jailbird father ment got I all! come
unusual, were body. an where top there — did I yes, we been an your
built basket and well, [looking] what his while a law,
IRRITATION: generous that how that ment, no, that see if live this
daughter is only allowed to oh as is his along to [with] [uncle] between
tween how because lady; as please! and the and comes
HAIR: how love now acquit last but daughter perhaps she nonsense!
exactly! her why, should and up five daughter there. pulls the head out
[there] callers, who and lady, very [the] doorway, also man not
IRRITATION: his blonde, somewhat display. gossip. his ners, all ing
[as] I friend, you! so yourself this [bowing] goes as athirst the why… of
the and but you, what no about allowed people,
HAIR: why my and gossips! the allow not quite than I ice: his no,
under there, and [staring] defend defending anybody. that useless
useless? useless! but are excuse we they how asking, you in best
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NO ACT PLAY #3

THE LEFT HAND: (below) where God’s The Lord (limping) Don’t
master Asleep Well, I I Yes, We — and — but half-past Yes, going
YOU: Haven’t and I’ll Oh, Besides — hm! Ugh! And temper. my “Let”
three people never ment Poor pretty (shrugging) I (beneath) that
What Pied Is Yes You no (after) me Need child? Oh, want Well, up You
always Ah, Strike (stamping) Sh! right! a new Have What on,
THE LEFT HAND: But nothing You No a Well — It came I have What
I the Well, can low — seventy (advancing) (stepping) to Yes! Get don’t
Is are possible Get wandering is (moving) But the your (He) opened,
mirror; straight; the coat, over Good (turning) Oh, Just some
(following) farmers,
YOU: Did chat And larly I? say. Your Yes, He to, that Yes, But most
about. But ally Still thing, What! father Yes, good But, — one really
Come, I it what really that I? But, me, (getting) Because, Perhaps know
I to twice, with
THE LEFT HAND: Thank you? Of Good. chair it; for is — doing These
Do Certainly Do reading I reliant. That Well, firmation own properly
There and no But, most Yes, But here Yes, Well, But you What I In you
I disapprove Yes, My in the What Well, Apart literature
YOU: we mortgage the Yes, best I one ask What Shall Of Ah, into
Everything and Naturally. exactly ent uses. Certainly, As scientiously
insuring That But abouts? Their Is — opinion tion What, some Well,
such hardly There here, That’s them. It meaning Divine But friend,
Yes easy
THE LEFT HAND: I — because fire Do Oh, consequence. fire. Where
Yes. matches. He —so really Really? He workman Oh, Ah, poor was my
here, He But Oh, He who That comes confesses with necessity again —
(standing) — you Indeed, that. Orphanage. But I been (getting)
hastily. would (more) have remains.
YOU: And I Ah, What? When pipe in Really? How Yes of exactly I has
Well, church But don’t (puts) try You? Yes; can when Oh, those Yes,
knee “have” until standing such It Dear No don’t off crying. In And so
life Yes, the worthy. It
04.04.02





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NO ACT PLAY #4

FLESHY: The when time. I shut after sort anything week, Young
arrangement, He naked, Miss … annulled … cally Anyway, where that
a and Yes What
BLONDE: Lover. And … I tion … I Suit he’d someone succession …
Yes, Which want lookout, apparent. necessarily … you like a Sure. Like
FLESHY: Like But And now, I’m (Stays) All You’ve That’s Dear! Yes,
Where I’m
BLONDE: Oh young sort … and … by … by And ment. know Oh, Yes,
my the I
FLESHY: That … practical one Just … take Just … retire, STOP I’d
other Well, I
BLONDE: Oh … Now, What? about bugger … in make Oh, I You I Do I
anyway. out … He’d
FLESHY: History over supposed (To back) You it think watched
getting years after … that Stop The … he sort A (CRASH) (bottle with
bottle frozen) I (After) I
BLONDE: (drops) Not I raising. I imagine. … don’t … this … don't,
(Her match) … who’s President’s expected not bookworm, so he of out
body RIGHT, (Under covering, her) I all Who’s (Who) Who’s
04.22.02





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NO ACT PLAY #5

ACTIONS: Where Wandering Wandering a man. They’ll Straighten A
Regulation Specification Indoctrination Boredom
CHARACTERS: You’ll Drill, Fight. Do Keep Do Kill You’ll a of Looking
Making Keeping How Sixteen. Shouldn’t Two You How
ACTIONS: Six Any No Where I Not Well, We Well, Sit Stick a good.
Thank Perfect I I I There’s aggressor. But Do
CHARACTERS: No That’s I’m Quite I Service It’s You’ll I For No. For
No. We’ll I You’ll I You’re
ACTIONS: (To) and for the afternoon Park. any Square (enters) Chirp,
Why, Chirp, spring, cloud chirp. chirp, Miss (To)
CHARACTERS: Miss (To) Spring year Chirp, Miss one (To) What
(and) gether he throat and voice. to late Who (He) The answer. (He)
ingly (T0) berry (He) forebodingly
ACTIONS: (To) C.I.A. (He) and (Very) The all Nazis Nazis what of
(Walking) (stands) with
CHARACTERS: (To) we (We) parts and (Walking) (Trembling) tion
(retreats) where (To) end Why, (He) (To) forming years on (Still) pay
(Walking) (To) red the sea (and) Avenue
ACTIONS: The teacher — seated dresses, When nary right. The
shepherd highly White are and The stiff, tumed The panied wearing
The Dog. (Woman’s) (The) imaginary (Slowly) The Blood
CHARACTERS: Teacher, white, I (They) folded Now, please their
come Will ward… (A) hand. I (Ignores) killed at (A) I dog me green
mother Mother (They) (In) woman (They) Silence. White
ACTIONS: Since sun, do stand great stiffly Pupils killed dog the (They)
boards I for (They) the Dog He robe. (In) and died, (The) statues
(Voices) the I they my (Raises) the
CHARACTERS: The is about TV soon any Oh. Hello. Yes? I I yourself
Or leged Oh Well Someone’s And
ACTIONS: I’m ask Have Is I It Do Doesn’t Are You given. It’s I’d To
space As If to There Are No, He
CHARACTERS: And of Has linear, Thus mouth, Oral? Are I Please I’m
against Why Why door. What You’re who’s Television You old A TV
Oral, Just
04.28.02





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NO ACT PLAY #6

TIME: the middle blue the both partition left They post picture
partition, the go Also, were be (interesting) me so stylized — for mine.
yours? there.
SCENE: of them post pretty. it. property. us. picture nudes dripping
be eaten heavens… want anything. edges, drop beyond be replace
TIME: not and me the reason reason… afraid endlessly skyscape, as
card; up the it! picture! gloss And to. “me…” (“Skies”) it sky heavy pre
me,
SCENE: because object man picture still. to up. to the in The arti my
reconstituted us, clouds! clouds? dirt. you round, ground, sound,
found? Sentimentalist!
TIME: every piece sentimental. butterfly. aimlessly wouldn’t to
morning born, bloody morning Why? at come birth. skip. ones that
look I what don’t dust… us. that great baked
SCENE: fingers see of other. bath he of and got before Stop water,
Sugar. she can she spades! tell on, acts ours. The has drinks.
TIME: like kids morally… friendly? everything. were. turned stuff.
were. huh? surprised. but a only you. you kids. it.
SCENE: aged about trees. there. don’t these very with then there I I’ve
be “Untended” Here one hear Then you clearly. trees slip your plans,
for and you change.
TIME: endure worst all You that can (looks) exag brought how as
plainly: and once none regret. it’s a your He place. he always Well,
“climb” and so in be daughter meet
SCENE: each speaks with “Hi”, (finished) you I some I if says, “You”
trust “around”? my days says, I to living some want safe. “a mean” sits
TIME: and play. bad. understand? What’s mean, any anything. you
grade (gropes) function… defensive. defensive? big — when
SCENE: The present. sits, money. One rat. (Yelling) I Show and
cautiously. you circle (time) want? in. Out! Please. Out! interrupt (He)
me.
TIME: kid! brother! Out! rat! sympathy. rat! I Find Out! star! (circle)
weeks with Please. want hate I help. Look, needed you. Sure.
SCENE: can. cheese Here. lack ain’t want? Cheeses Village? Village?
what Look. hip little like want you ass either, bottom, Orange? Worse.
04.28.02





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NO ACT PLAY #7

MASK: (weeping) have have hope… believe, Then your ber, I Yes,
rifices, You gave here, stronger, was kissed progress, for there wanted
you, any ungrateful on and adorable Oh! And boy! He’s gusting I
onster
HIS SISTER: You (sighing) (singing) ster (to) I’ll (She) Once own to
never during And think Oh, That’s Farewell, Brother, (He) (bitterly)
How himself. (to) owned, can’t, (to) last, no Son! reply reflecting
rectly, vain are enough Oh!
MASK: Let’s tion. Or (She) by towards this the Pawnbroker! (They)
Grandmother, of ence. Keep that’s (singing) (alone) his nothing,
(Silence) She viction; and Listen and the one you I stamped, Alas,
(she’s)
HIS SISTER: (desperate) me Far I’m not So? You follow That’s count,
That’s to Oh I’m seven And That’s tained But, (He) other Oh down out
sible, There’s comes (agitation) (at) work? (a)
MASK: must (They) Let’s lige in ally, Oh and by Oh, (to) get I carrots
(to) embraces sign hashed (without) I’m my (like) I potatoes! (to) Don’t
Oh, (singing)
HIS SISTER: (towards) son, (same) hashed (entering) (to) what
darling shake I You What? Speak, Hashed toes. (aside) would his Oh,
Have sons. The my (to) arms. back brown tradition. But That’s worry,
The
05.29.02